Wellness Series Week 12 The Law of Developmental Motivation

Okay, sorry I'm late. It's not that I'm not motivated. In fact, at our retreat I even handed out papers on goal setting and motivation. Let's face it, I'm the girl who reads endlessly about how to finally have the LIFE YOU ALWAYS WANTED!!

But according to Greg Anderson, I'm probably trying to satisfy my needs through "deficiency motivation", a term coined by Dr. Wayne Dyer. In other words, I am trying to motivate myself from the standpoint of "what is wrong with me". And they're right, there is a bit of that thinking going on in my head. I do fall into the trap of thinking that my life is deficient in some way, and that if I could only have this, then I would have that, or if I had that, then I'd be happy. Bad mindset, says Greg. There will always be something missing if I think that way. I'll just attract more lack.

Only unsatisfied needs motivate, he says. But it is much better to regard myself as complete right NOW, and to not include the concept of "lack" in my life (this is where the movie "The Secret" takes its main idea--not that I subscribe to that theory) or else what is deficient in my life will expand (and I sure don't want that). The mantra for me to remember is: "I am complete but not finished."

And so, instead, I should seek the development of my life's potential. Anderson sites three elements to for me to achieve that. I need: 1)Knowledge, or the "what to do"/"why to do it", 2) Skill, the "how to do it" (for example, establishing a new way of thinking), and 3) Desire, or the "want to do it", the element that is needed to bring knowledge and skill into reality. Anderson claims that the wrong "want to do it" is what holds most of us back from wellness. Being motivated by our deficiencies, rather than by having a brand new vision of ourselves, as whole, complete, fully alive beings RIGHT NOW, is what keeps us miserable. We must have goals that have deep meaning, ones that can truly fulfill us.

So, I won't strive to have a fancy car, for it will just sit in my driveway while I conjure up a new desire. I won't save for a big house (or go in debt buying one!) just to impress my friends. I don't need those things to be complete--none of us do! We are already complete and whole! Instead, we all need to go out and fulfill the dreams that enhance who we truly are, and start living our lives to the fullest.